so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Randomize
