I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
