if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
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