P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
