I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
