I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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