Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
