I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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