batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Randomize
