Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Randomize