all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
