4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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