You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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