the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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