I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
