I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize