I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
