Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Randomize
