Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize