People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
