Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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