I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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