I wish I could punch you in the face.
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
i think my cat just said my name.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Randomize
