Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
