Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
