Having a random hookup so left but love u
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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