and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
