At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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