i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
try to milk me bitch
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
