So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
