If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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