I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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