Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
