There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Drake has all the answers
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
