That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
