I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
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