where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Hypothermia
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
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