Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
