Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
