we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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