This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Vodka?
Forever.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
