I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize
