is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
