ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
