youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
