I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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