how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
