mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Randomize
