If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
