i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Couch. On fire.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
