God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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