What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
