If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Randomize