i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
